Mom of Son With Autism's Open Letter to Man at Riverview Zoo
Mom Writes Open Letter to a Man at the Zoo Who Said Her Teen With Autism Shouldn't Be in Public
After a long week, Ashley Wright promised her 13-year-old son, Logan, a trip to his favorite place, the zoo two hours from their home. Needing to use the bathroom after a long drive, Ashley, her 11-year-old daughter, Brinlee, and Logan made their way to the bathroom, when Ashley noticed a man with his family who was continually turning around to look at them. Logan, who has autism, among other diagnoses, was flapping his arms and making loud noises, because he was so pumped to be in his favorite place — but then "all hell broke loose," and the man who was staring ended up yelling about Ashley and her kids.
In an open letter posted to Facebook, the mom addressed the man and his ignorance in the hopes that no other special-needs family ever feels the way he made them feel at the zoo.
"To the man at the Peterborough Zoo today . . . This letter is for you. Will you probably ever see it? No. Do I think you will actually care even if you did? Probably not. Maybe, just maybe, someone else will read this, though, and think twice about making someone feel the way you did today," the mom wrote.
Ashley went on to explain that after she used the restroom, she knew something was wrong, as Logan — who she says is nearly 200 pounds and over six feet tall — had started to pinch himself while grinding his teeth and making a loud, growling noise.
"You got about two feet away from us and very loudly yelled: 'WHY DO PEOPLE BRING KIDS LIKE THIS OUT IN PUBLIC? THEY RUIN SOCIETY.'"
"I held on his arms and the three of us walked to the picnic area not far from the bathrooms. I noticed you and your family were stopped and staring at us again. I was getting slightly annoyed at this point, but you still weren't my concern; my very upset, very stressed out son was," she wrote. "I finally was able to get him to voice 'PEE' and I realized we needed to make our way back to the bathroom. No big deal right? WRONG. I know you watched us. I could see it out of the corner of my eye as Logan tried to grab my hair, and when he couldn't, he pulled his own while still very loudly screaming 'EEEEEEEE.' He bit his arm. Yes there were others staring, but they glanced away quickly. You started walking closer to us and my brain instantly went into thinking, sir, please stay away I'm trying to protect myself, my daughter, and my son; I don't need another potential person getting hurt. You got about two feet away from us and very loudly yelled: 'WHY DO PEOPLE BRING KIDS LIKE THIS OUT IN PUBLIC? THEY RUIN SOCIETY.'"
Ashley understands that her son's actions may have appeared a bit scary to some and that he was potentially being disruptive to families out having a fun day, including the man in question. However, she says that what this man doesn't understand is that Logan deserves to be in public just as much as everyone else. She wrote:
He doesn't ruin the society. He didn't hurt anyone. We made it to the bathroom unscathed he peed. I turned away and cried because I was relieved it went so well, but I also cried because I know there will be days like this. Days where people stare. Days where people are ignorant and hurtful. Days where we thought we, too, would have a fun family outing, and that just wasn't how it started.
Was I asking for your help? Your opinion? Your advice? Nope. But you, a man about six-foot-three and easily 250 pounds, watched a mom who could've easily been hurt and scared, and made a situation worse. You could've asked me if I needed help. I would've politely declined, since like I said, the last thing I need is to have to worry about another person in this situation, but you still could've. Or you could've done what the majority of people do: look at us, look away, and go on about your business.
After the second trip to the bathroom, Ashley and her kids made their way to the camels, Logan's favorite section, and saw the man again. This time he said nothing, but Ashley was still so affected by his words and actions. The mom ended her open letter with a message to him, and any other person who may feel similarly to him about kids like Logan.
"All I can hope is that in the future if a situation like this happens again you don't make another family feel the way you made ours feel today," she wrote. "I also sincerely hope your children don't grow up feeling that kids like Logan shouldn't be out in public. Because he needs that social interaction. He deserves to get to see his camels after a good week of behavior. He deserves to be treated just as good as anyone else."
