The Real Mom's Guide to Surviving Divorce

Even an amicable split will take a psychological toll on the entire family. Melissa V. found therapy especially helpful to get her and her two children through a separation. "I got divorced when they were 4 and 2, and I took them to a very good counselor who specializes in child psychology as well as divorce issues," she recalls. "It helped them a lot." Meeting with a therapist is a great way to talk about feelings and make sense of a confusing scenario. The therapist may also be able to advise you on how to move on when your ex is still involved in your life.

Though it's tempting, Reshman A. advises single moms to "never say anything negative about your ex in front of your child, no matter how horrid he is to you." Save the smack talk for girls night, but try to keep it to a minimum. Though it's a therapeutic, complaining about your ex may make it harder to move on.

Unless you have built a career around your married name, it may be worthwhile to return to your original name. "It was like reclaiming my individuality and sense of who I am," La Keeda H. says of switching to her maiden name. But be forewarned: teachers, coaches, and other adults in your child's life may still refer to you as Mrs. So-and-So. As long as you're OK with constantly correcting them, then make the switch.

Wedding photos with their father won't help you move forward, but seeing dad around the house is important to them. "In her room, make sure there is a photo of her and her dad," Kerry L. suggests. "If she does miss him, you can take her in and say, 'There's Daddy — you'll see him soon.'" This assures your children that their dad still loves them, even though he's no longer around all the time.

While your family and friends are a great support system, they may not be able to relate to your situation. Seek out women who are also going through a divorce. See if there are any other single moms at your child's school, or join an online community, like Circle of Moms.

Sometimes, the best support comes from your little ones. That was the case for Emily J., whose son got her through many tear-filled nights. "He hugs me and tell me he loves me every night," she says. "He is all I need and all I'm living for now."

It's easy to slip into sweatpants and binge on Ben & Jerry's after a divorce, but that only slows down the healing process. Rather than wallowing, Kayrene W. suggests a bit of pampering. "Do something just for you, every single day," she says. "That may sound selfish at first blush, but if you are taking care of yourself then you are a much better mommy for your kids." Whether it's going to the gym or polishing your nails at night, make sure to treat yourself every day. After the drama you've dealt with, you more than deserve it.