43 Things That Kids Can Be Accurately Described As

1. Small-scale explosions.
2. The sticky residue left over by a juice spill.
3. A spinning top that doesn't actually stop.
4. A beehive.

5. A blender without a lid.
6. Going up the down escalator.
7. Roller coasters.
8. Roller coasters without a seat belt.

9. The twister in The Wizard of Oz.
10. Legos without instructions.
11. Improv comedy actors.
12. A Jackson Pollock masterpiece.

13. A runaway porta-potty.
14. The Energizer Bunny.
15. A clothing stain of an unknown origin.
16. Oncoming traffic.

17. A puppy.
18. A kitten.
19. A rabbit.

20. A hyperactive puppy.
21. A hyperactive kitten.
22. A hyperactive rabbit.

23. Drunk old people.
24. Food critics.
25. A pot of boiling water.
26. A helicopter spinning too close to the ground.

27. Ron Swanson.
28. Adults who are still children.
29. A carnival ride that you can't get off.
30. A thousand beeping car horns.
31. A lost sock at the bottom of a ball pit.

32. Disasters in slow-motion.
33. Disasters in fast-forward.
34. Disasters.

35. A thousand multicolored bouncy balls coming down a steep hill you're standing at the bottom of.
36. Vacuums.
37. A pile of unwashed dishes.
38. The game Perfection.

39. An animal in shoes.
40. One-hundred Slinkys going down a narrow staircase.
41. A smell you can't identify.
42. A too-full garbage can . . .
43. . . . with a lid that won't close.