What 1 Expert Says About Play Could Change Your Child's Future

Flickr user David D

It is becoming increasingly difficult for a child to simply be a child in their preschool years, as now the pressure to perform academically is resulting in kindergarten becoming the new first grade, and preschool becoming the new kindergarten. Erika Christakis, an early childhood educator and mom, addresses this phenomenon of parents and educators worrying about children being "behind" by the time they get to kindergarten and says the one thing that can "fix" it all is actually very simple: play.

In her new book, The Importance of Being Little: What Preschoolers Really Need From Grownups ($18, originally $28), Christakis goes in depth to explain what she calls a "false dichotomy" between academics and play, and encourages parents to push back as there should be no trade-off between the two things.

We spoke to Christakis about her book and got some amazing tips to help parents understand what their preschooler actually needs from them, and how meaningful play can change their child's future.

01
Move away from the idea that play and learning are different things.
Flickr user Paul David

Move away from the idea that play and learning are different things.

One of Christakis's most stressed arguments is that play and learning should be looked at as things that go hand in hand — "playful learning," she calls it. Science tells us that experience-based, exploratory, creative, and imaginative kinds of play are directly linked to strong academic and cognitive outcomes. For example, building a ramp with blocks and sending cars down it supports mathmatical thinking, engineering, and measuring. Having a child sit to fill out an alphabet worksheet doesn't engage their mind or translate to learning in the same way as play does.

She says, "I think parents can really take some comfort — no matter what their child's early learning environment is like — in knowing that they really can create a play-based environment for their child that is not in opposition to learning goals, but is going to produce the outcomes that we want."

02
Repair the "play habitat."
Flickr user Raúl Hernández González

Repair the "play habitat."

Many of the toys available for children now are what Christakis calls "gizmos," or, toys that really only do one thing — but if a child is handed something more open-ended, like blocks, they're forced to make cognitive leaps. For example, if a child has a toy cell phone, they know the toy's purpose is to be a phone. If a child is handed blocks, which can be used to build any number of things, and they put one to their ear as a phone, they're making a symbolic connection between a block and a real thing.

To restore this type of open-ended play, we can help our children to think outside the box when playing with simpler objects. Rather than play solely with "gizmos," we can ask kids, "Do you think we could make a car out of some of the things we find in the kitchen?"

03
Make questions open-ended.
Flickr user Seattle Parks

Make questions open-ended.

If a child is drawing something that looks like a house, and an adult says, "Oh, what a nice house," that gives the child zero opportunity to share his creative train of thought, nor does it lead anywhere else. If you change the dialogue to "Tell me about your drawing," you've opened the floor for the child to discuss his process, and he might tell you that it's not a house at all, but something completely different.

We often — and usually unintentionally — steer our kids in a very specfic direction; for example, when we have them make Thanksgiving turkeys made out of a hand tracing (one of Christakis's least favorite projects). Those types of projects are cute and adults like them, but they don't allow our child to think creatively or originally.

04
Know that your child is hardwired to learn.
Flickr user Donnie Ray Jones

Know that your child is hardwired to learn.

Christakis states that, "learning and schooling are not the same thing," and that kids seem to be working more but learning less. There are parents and teachers that will agree that children are being pressured to learn too much and should just play — thus separating the two things — but Christakis disagrees.

I think that they can learn more through experience-based, relationship-based, playful learning. I do think there is a ton of evidence that we need to slow down, give kids more time to play, more time to engage more time to think meaningfully about what they're doing instead of just doing a craft because it's Halloween . . . . We need to listen to kids and see what engages them but I do want to be clear: it shouldn't be 'Turn them loose, let them play;' it has to be an intentional environment where we've set up kids to be successful in learning through their relationships and their play.

05
Declutter to prevent boredom.
Flickr user David D

Declutter to prevent boredom.

We tend to assume that our children have short attention spans because they are bored of what they're playing with and need something new, but Christakis thinks children get bored so quickly because they haven't spent enough time on a meaningful activity. When we have enviornments full of "stuff," the temptation to "pull things out of your bag of tricks" at the first sign of boredom becomes overwhelming. Sometimes when there's less in a room, it's easier to keep the child engaged more deeply and for longer.

"It’s a habit of mind for all of us as adults to slow down and be more mindful of what we’re using, what we’re doing. And it’s the same kind of habit of mind for kids. But as parents we can really help them them along by not throwing constant solutions at them."

06
Get to know your child's teacher.
Flickr user U.S. Department of Agriculture

Get to know your child's teacher.

Bridging the gap between a child's home life and school life is vital to a child's success both in and out of the classroom. The more a teacher knows and understands about your child — his interests, strengths, the way he likes to do things — the better she can serve him in ways that both directly and indirectly affect learning.

From Christakis's perspective, two things teachers want children to be armed with when they start preschool are social and emotional skills, both of which are linked to academic success and can be achieved through play.

07
Focus on your child's relationships and conversation skills.
Flickr user Seattle Parks

Focus on your child's relationships and conversation skills.

"I think if I were telling a parent what they can do that would really, really change everything. I would say to focus on conversation. Let your child talk, let your child listen, cultivate dialogue," Christakis says. She goes on to explain that there is a ton of supporting research that strong oral language and conversation skills are very beneficial for learning and building relationships (which also circles back to creating open-ended questions to encourage meaningful discussion).

08
Watch your kids carefully.
Flickr user Mindy Gerecke

Watch your kids carefully.

Observing our children is one of the best ways we can aid learning and attempt to eliminate some of the failures and frustrations that may occur. Once you are really in tune with your child's interests, strengths, and things they're having trouble with, you can try to better accommodate learning without asking too much or too little of them.

Especially for children in the preschool years, breaking down tasks — for example, instead of "Clean your room," we can try, "Let's put away all of the blue things" — leads to meaningful activities that not only foster independence, but become a version of play that achieves a task. When we set our children up for success, we can watch them achieve more and learn more in a cognitively rich way.