A Mom Shared Why "Being the Center of the Family" Is So Exhausting, and Wow, Preach
Chaunie Brusie, a mom and blogger, recently had an off day. In fact, her day went so poorly, she wrote a Facebook post about how she felt as though everything was slipping through the cracks. Fortunately, after some reflection and a run-in with a friendly coffee barista, Chaunie's outlook completely changed.
"Yesterday, I failed as a mom. And I don't mean in a cutesy 'OMG #fail' kinda way," she wrote. "I mean I failed HARD. I was late picking the kids up from school, causing my middle child to cry and instead of comforting her, I scolded her because I was so frustrated with myself. I then got sassy with a bank teller, which is not like me at all, and ended the evening making my oldest burst into tears at dinner."
Unfortunately, her bad day didn't end after dinner time. By time she went to bed, Chaunie, completely overwhelmed by her incomplete to-do list, had also picked a fight with her husband.
I went to bed so utterly exhausted and defeated, feeling the weight of everything I was failing at crushing me like a physical elephant on my chest: the spelling test for my son today I had forgotten about, all of Sara's reading logs and that packet of reading games I forgot to send back (or do), birthday present for my niece, the 10 million emotional needs my kids have had since switching schools, the game night I promised my kids but didn't do, the laundry, the grocery shopping, the house cleaning, switching clothes Emmy is growing out of, Jake needs new shoes and he still can't tie laces, my marriage in desperate need of well — something other than passing a baby back and forth — it's all too much.
Chaunie knows that she's trying her best to do whatever she has to in order to keep her family afloat and that there's nothing wrong with admitting that being a parent is hard. "It's all so much," she wrote. "Sometimes I just get so exhausted being the center of the family — because we are, aren't we mamas? Everyone looks to us and it's such a terrifying responsibility that I feel like I'm crumbling under right now."
The next morning, however, she stopped for a coffee and got some unexpected but much-needed words of encouragement from a barista. "We will fail. We will have weak moments. We will lay in our beds and night and cry and wonder if our kids will wind up remembering that one time we forgot to pick them up and if that becomes their defining life moment," said Chaunie. "But we are also strong. And when we are not? Well, there's always coffee — and hopefully a helping hand when we need it the most."