I'm Happily Married, but I Chose to Stop Wearing My Diamond Ring

Katy Anderson
Katy Anderson

When my husband proposed to me, he presented me with a beautiful ring that featured a small diamond from his mother's original engagement ring. I loved it because of its history and because it represented a commitment that we were making together. But, if I'm being totally honest, it never really felt at home on my finger. It never really felt like "me."

The truth is, I have never been a diamond person, and I don't agree with the idea that diamonds are every girls' best friend. That is why I no longer wear my original wedding ring, and wear one with my favorite stone, turquoise, instead.

There are no rules, and that's what I ultimately decided for myself. I'm not worried about how other people feel about my ring: after all, I'm the one wearing it every day!

Unconventional engagement rings are becoming more popular. Many people are wanting to find a ring that's unique to them and/or more cost effective. These rings can be simple or elaborate, vintage or trendy. Some feature pearls, gemstones, or tiny diamonds, and others shine on their own as a simple band. There are no rules, and that's what I ultimately decided for myself. I'm not worried about how other people feel about my ring, after all – I'm the one wearing it every day!

Despite what clever marketing campaigns would have you believe, not all people are concerned about the size of the diamond on their finger (or whether it even has one) when they get engaged. The amount of money spent on a ring is in no way an indication of the success of a marriage.

My husband continually asked me if I wanted to have a bigger diamond in the first years of our marriage, and I know that it's an investment he would have made if I had requested it, but it was never something that I desired. What I really wanted was a ring with a big chunk of turquoise that fit with my own personal style.

So, for our 10-year anniversary, my husband and I took a trip to Santa Fe, where I picked out the exact stone that I loved and had a ring custom made. Part of me was apprehensive about breaking with tradition, but what really mattered was how I felt about it and the commitment to my husband that it represents. The ring was also a symbol of a memorable trip for us — celebrating 10 years together.

I still have my diamond ring, and it will always hold a special place in my heart as it was given to me when my husband proposed. I also don't think there's anything wrong with someone who rocks a giant diamond ring (or any other size). Do you! But if you also like the idea of a non-traditional engagement ring or you want to trade in the bling for something unique to you, there are a lot of stunning alternative rings out there. The point is, there is no right way to wear or not wear an engagement or wedding ring. What matters is how you and your partner feel about it. After all, just because something is traditional, doesn't make it better than anything else.