Why Attending the RNC Makes Me Nervous For America's Future

I was nervous to come to Cleveland. I read journalists were receiving war-reporting training in anticipation of violence. In addition, Ohio has an open-carry law and news in general has been anything but reassuring lately.

But once here, my worries over safety subsided. The security is diligent, and the friendly people of Cleveland got their city ready for the crowds. Yet, the RNC has disturbed me for other reasons. It's featured a lineup of angry speakers who have preyed on people's anxieties. The main policy idea I've gathered so far: send Hillary Clinton to prison.

Night one's program felt like sad story time. One after another, speakers got up to rail against Clinton for the tragic Benghazi attack. When Patricia Smith, a mother who lost her son in the attack, got up to speak, it felt like an exploitation of her grief. Two former Marines also recounted their experience as security contractors during the attack, in a story that included uncomfortable jokes (one about tampons). And former Mayor Rudy Giuliani gave an over-the-top fiery speech questioning Clinton's ability to protect Americans.

Day two was even crazier. NJ Governor Chris Christie got on stage to "put Hillary Clinton on trial." Here's how it worked: Christie would explain something horrible that happened in the world and then ask the crowd if Clinton was guilty or not guilty. (Spoiler, they always chose guilty.) The rhetorical gimmick was catnip for a crowd that spontaneously shouts "Lock her up!" throughout the day. They actually interrupted his speech multiple times to do so.

In the speech, Christie accused Clinton of being responsible for the 2014 kidnappings of schoolgirls in Nigeria by Boko Haram. He said: "In Nigeria, Hillary Clinton amazingly fought for two years to keep an Al-Qaeda affiliate off the terrorist watch list. What happened because of this reckless action by the candidate who is the self-proclaimed champion of women around the world? These terrorists abducted hundreds of innocent young girls two years ago. These schoolgirls are still missing today."

Keep in mind the kidnappings happened more than a year after Clinton stepped down as secretary of state in 2013. And while you can suggest that her actions as the country's top diplomat led to international instability, it's a far stretch to lay the blame of terrorist actions at her feet. The speech felt like internet conspiracy theories come to life — and the crowd went crazy for it. The New York Times fact-checked Christie's speech. Here's what it said about Clinton's record on Boko Haram:

But the convention-goers haven't heard these facts. They've heard that Clinton is directly responsible for the kidnappings of hundreds of girls. Later Tuesday night, Ben Carson got up and tied Hillary Clinton to the devil. If you want to imagine what the RNC is like, imagine being surrounded by thousands of delegates who might think Clinton is the devil.

Then there is the bizarre perception of the Obamas. One Oklahoma delegate told me she was disappointed by Michelle Obama as first lady: "I don't think she's been engaged with the public and I don't think she's made a whole lot of effort to try to be liked." That statement ignores the truth of the last eight years and Obama's creative efforts to reach everyday Americans on social media, in pop culture, or through initiatives like Let's Move and Let Girls Learn.

But it's not just top Democratic officials convention-goers have problems with. They take issue with everyday Americans, too. People we talked to felt minorities or poor people are looking for handouts. Elizabeth Berecin, a 21-year-old Republican, told us, "A lot of minorities do vote Democrat and the problem with that is the Democrats, I believe, are more for social welfare. And when you're in the slums and you don't have a lot of money, getting a paycheck sounds really nice."

On the convention floor, some of the biggest cheers came whenever anyone declared "Blue Lives Matter!" On day one, the crowd let out a big cheer when Sheriff David Clarke announced that the officers had been acquitted in the Freddie Gray case. They also ate up speeches by people who lost their children at the hands of "illegal aliens," stories that helped paint all undocumented immigrants as mortally dangerous.

On Tuesday night, I did have one refreshing conversation with Eugene Craig III, a black man who serves as vice chair of the Maryland Republican party. While he is disturbed with Donald Trump and his supporters, he is passionate about small government and wants to have a seat at the table in order to affect change in his party. And he is still undecided about how he will vote in November.

Craig summed up the issues with the convention: "People don't look at facts. They look at what their emotions tell them. What their anxieties tell them. And when you're getting hit with stuff that you should be anxious about all the time, you start to believe it." Craig said Trump doesn't reach out to young voters and instead appeals to his base of "old white folks." He continued, "The entire convention is geared towards folks that are aging and longing for an America that has long been gone. I mean Scott Baio and a male lingerie model. Dude was modeling panties when I was 1 year old. Let's be real about this." The lingerie model is Antonio Sabato Jr., who thinks Barack Obama is a Muslim and addressed the convention Monday.

Craig said that conservative media has helped cultivate a fear of "others" and that Trump has taken advantage of it, first by jumping on the birther train. Craig explained, "If this is the party of personal liberty and individual responsibility, then goddammit be the party of individual responsibility. We're not the party of 'They took our jobs.' Quite frankly that's what Donald Trump panders to."

If there is hope for the GOP, it lives in the young people like Craig we've met here. Many of them told us that they disagree with their party platform on issues like gay marriage or abortion. These people are here, and they exist. And it would be in the interest of the GOP to start listening to them.