I Went On a Date With a Career Magician

But that's ALL we talked about. Of course I had several questions, but I can only pretend to care about all the famous academics who study magic for so long. Also, what does it even mean to study magic? Fifteen minutes into the date, I already knew he's a little bit too dedicated to this identity.

When he saw a girl reading Harry Potter at the bar, he thought he was obligated to go talk to her because he's also a wizard. I love Harry Potter, but let's not fool ourselves — his magic is deception, not spells. At this point the only thought going through my mind was, "Is this dude joking?" I really couldn't be sure but later confirmed he was indeed serious about being a wizard.

David Blaine is obviously talented, but every time I see him, I can't help but laugh. So when I brought up David Blaine's antics, I had to hold back giggles again when I discovered how much Jamie Dornan look-alike revered him. I thought it best not to bring up Criss Angel so I didn't embarass myself laughing.

I'm a curious person, so I obviously wanted to find out the tricks of the trade. Guess what? He told me if he revealed the secrets of magic, he would be shunned by the community. The community? Did he mean the circuit of traveling magicians would hex him? Probably.

I'm aware how magicians work — they trick your mind and find ways to fool your brain. So when I asked him how he expected women to trust him, he said he was an honest liar. I'm still not exactly sure what that means, even after he explained it, but I know one thing: anyone who labels themselves a liar, no matter the preceding adjective, on a first date is not going on a second one.

When I agreed to go on the date, I was kind of under the impression magic was just something he did for fun. Not the case. He performed sold-out shows (which he invited me to, but I would have to buy a ticket). I'm wary of career magicians because I was once made a fool of in front of my high school, so this did not fare well for him. I even inquired how aforementioned magician accomplished the trick (almost making me cry) and Jamie Dornan look-alike refused to tell me.

OK, making the cork disappear once is cool. Maybe twice is cool. Seventeen times later is just distracting and annoying. Either tell me how you do it or stop, kindly. Oh, you brought a coin to pull from behind my ear? Clever. Never seen that one before.

I know I said I was into weird, and I still am. But ultimately, Jamie Dornan look-alike was a little arrogant (he knows he's attractive — how could he not?) and a little too into being a magician. It felt more like an interview that didn't produce many answers, instead of a date. We barely talked about anything other than magic, let alone anything about myself. I'm glad I went for the story, but I don't think I will be going on any dates with another magician again.