Date Night: Before and After Kids

You spend two hours, without interruption, in the bathroom doing all sorts of things to make yourself look gorgeous — and you still don't think you have enough time.

You spend two minutes, with constant interruption, applying whatever paste you can find that'll cover the bags under your eyes. It's the most time that you've had to yourself in weeks!

You search your closet for the perfect dress, and after narrowing it down to two options, you try them on with any number of heels, necklaces, and handbags before deciding which works best.

You frequently use the term "fancy leggings" and are lucky to get out of the house without getting whatever you're wearing covered in snot, pureed carrots, or marker.

The night is yours! You start with drinks at a new cocktail bar you've been meaning to try followed by 8 p.m. dinner reservations at a dimly lit romantic eatery. After that, who knows? Maybe a nice walk through the city, postdinner drinks at a sexy wine bar, or dancing at a salsa club. You'll see what you're in the mood for after the bill comes.

With a $15-per-hour babysitter on the clock, you beeline straight for your neighborhood restaurant. With no need for a reservation this early, you have your pick of tables and feel good knowing you can be in and out in two hours.

You consult with your waiter about the specials — and how they'll pair with the bottle of wine you had in mind — and deliberate over multiple courses. When the food arrives, you savor every bite. Now, what to share for dessert?

"Food? Oh, I ate it already."

You try not to talk about work, and then move on to other topics you both are passionate about — politics, books, travel. By the time you realize it, you've decided on your next vacation spot!

You try not to talk about kids, and then do it anyway. By the time you realize it, you've been talking about baby poop for 20 minutes.

Sure, it's not as passionate as when you were first dating, but after an exciting night like this, you still manage to make a little magic happen.

Sure, it's not as passionate as when you were first married, but after an exhausting night like this, you're thrilled that you haven't already fallen asleep to the latest episode of House of Cards.

You wake up in each other's arms, relaxed and still beaming from an amazing night. "What should we do today?!"

You wake up at an ungodly hour and wonder if it was even worth it. (Hint: it will be . . . once they go to college.)