On the first episode of The Late Show in 2017, Stephen Colbert addressed how Congress, President-elect Trump, and Russia are starting off the new year.
As the late-night host pointed out in his monologue, Republican members of Congress met in secret to "eviscerate the office of Congressional ethics," an independent office that investigates unethical behavior in Congress. After Congressman Bob Goodlack insisted that this plan "does nothing to impede [the office's] work" Colbert sarcastically exclaimed, "So it's not bad! That's why they did it in secret, behind closed doors. That's where you do all of the things you're most proud of."
Colbert went on to discuss that even President-elect Trump told Congress that this was immoral via Twitter, which led the congressmen to abandon the vote. "When Donald Trump calls you out for being unethical, that's a wake up call. That's like if Keith Richards told you to moisturize" the comedian joked.
Trump also started off the year with a series of tweets crediting himself for the increase in points of the Consumer Confidence Index and wishing his "many enemies and those who have fought me and lost so badly they just don't know what to do" a happy new year. Colbert joked that this was evidence of Trump embracing the holiday spirit, much like Jesus would have done. "It reminds me of Jesus's famous tweet, 'Suck it @PontiusPilate. I rose from the dead. @TheRealJesus is gonna live forever. Love!'"
Despite US intelligence findings that Russia influenced the election by hacking the DNC, Trump insisted in an interview that, "I know a lot about hacking and hacking is a very hard thing to prove. So it could be somebody else. I also know things that other people don't know, so they can be not sure of this situation." When asked what information he knows, the president-elect responds, "You'll find out Tuesday or Wednesday." Colbert finished his monologue by saying, "He needs time to digest the information before he yanks it out of his *ss."