18 of the Biggest Revelations From Pamela Anderson's Candid Netflix Documentary

Anderson begins the documentary by recounting "some horrible things" she experienced when she was a kid, starting with a female babysitter who abused her. "My parents thought she was a great babysitter 'cause she brought presents all the time, but she was molesting me," she revealed, noting she went through "three or four years of abuse." Anderson even confessed that she once tried to kill her babysitter. "I tried to stab her in the heart with a candy cane pen," she recalled. "And then I told her I wanted her to die. She died in a car accident the next day, so I thought I killed her with my magical mind, and I couldn't tell anybody."

In a diary entry, Anderson recalls a traumatic incident that occurred when she and a friend of hers went to hang out at a friend's condo. While her friend was upstairs with "the guy she had a crush on," Anderson claims she was raped by a 25-year-old man, whom she refers to as her friend's friend. She never told anyone what happened to her. "I tried to forget it, but it felt like it was tattooed on my forehead," she shares in the documentary. "I really had this image of 'I had sex' on my forehead when I didn't want anyone to know that I had it."

Anderson recalls feeling "very, very shy" and "super self-conscious" after being sexually abused as a child, which "paralyzed" her during her first Playboy photo shoot. However, she says that the first snap of a picture broke her out of shame. "I felt like I was throwing myself off a bridge and falling in . . . That was the first time I felt like I'd broken free of something." She adds: "It felt like it was kind of a gateway to another world. Now I was going to take the power of my own sexuality, and I did it, I think, in a really big way."

The former model says that when she started honestly answering the media's questions about her body and plastic surgery, it started a downward spiral in terms of how she was treated. "I don't know why my boobs, people were so interested, they weren't that newsworthy," Anderson says. "But I was just so naive. And I think, at the time, it was pretty nervy to say the truth . . . It was disturbing 'cause it was like, 'Oh my God. Really? Is this what we're talking about again?'"

Anderson and Lee's explosive whirlwind romance led to the two getting married within four days of dating. The relationship moved so quickly that Anderson didn't even have a chance to break things off with her ex Kelly Slater, whom she was still dating when she tied the knot with Lee. She says that, at the time, she was supposed to go with Slater to Florida to meet his family, but her first phone call to him was to tell her she was married. "He's like, 'What?!' That was horrible," Anderson says.

Anderson says she and Lee finally realized their safe was gone when Lee went to retrieve something from it one day, and at the time, he hoped it was just a practical joke. She adds that the two had no idea when their safe was stolen because they had so much construction going on at their house back then, noting that it could've been taken anytime within a six-month time period. "We didn't have any idea that anything in there was gonna be something that would hurt us," Anderson says — until they anonymously received a VHS copy of their sex tape in the mail.

At the time of Lee and Anderson's trial, Anderson was pregnant with their second child, and she was worried that the brutal depositions would negatively impact the health of their baby. She recalls seeing men in the courtroom holding up naked pictures of her and being questioned about her sex life on the stand. "The lawyers basically said, 'You're in Playboy. You have no right to privacy,'" Anderson shares. "I kept on thinking, how am I being questioned about my sexuality and preferences and body parts and where I like to make love when it's stolen property? It made me feel like I was such a horrible woman . . . Playboy was empowering for me, but in this case, it felt like a rape."

Reflecting on the former couple's relationship and some red flags, Anderson recalls how Lee would often stop by the set of "Baywatch," noting one particular instance in which she claims he trashed her trailer in a jealous rage after learning that she had to kiss her costar David Chokachi in a scene. "He lost it," she recounts in a diary entry. "He came and trashed my trailer on the set. Put his fist through a cabinet." In an old clip of an MSNBC interview with "Baywatch" cocreator Michael Berk, he said Lee knew Anderson's call times and "would show up in the scenes where there could be an opportunity for him to get pissed." Anderson also reveals that once the "Baywatch" crew became privy to Lee's fits of anger, they'd "change the dialogue" and "change the scene" if they saw him coming.

Anderson gave birth to her and Lee's second child, Dylan, on Dec. 29, 1997. Nearly a year after his arrival, she wrote a letter detailing some of the tumultuous events he witnessed at that time — which included a domestic dispute between Lee and Anderson that resulted in Lee going to jail for six months as well as their separation — so he could understand what happened when he was older. "October 11, 1998, my little Dilly. I felt so compelled to write to you, my little man. You've seen a lot in your nine months, and I wanted to write to you so one day you can read this and maybe understand how we came to be where we are," she wrote.

In the documentary, Anderson briefly touches on her controversial friendship with Assange — who's charged with allegedly aiding efforts to leak classified government information and is currently in a London prison fighting extradition to the US — and states that "it's nice to know that someone's whole life is about truth and discovering truth."

Anderson says she never got the chance to tell her sons about her past — including posing nude in Playboy and her and Lee's sex tape — on her terms, because they found out beforehand. Her son, Brandon, says, "When I was a kid, I thought everyone knew things about me and my family that they never should've known." "Like everyone had this dirty little secret about my family," he adds. He even recalls being "very quick to fight" anyone who brought up his mom at school. Anderson also recounts a time when her son Dylan came to her crying and asked, "Mom, why did you do that tape?"

Anderson addresses rumors that she and Lee planned to leak their sex tape, calling it "ridiculous." Soon after their leak, it became common practice for other stars to put out their own tapes in an effort to get famous. "It kind of left us in that category," she says, also affirming that she doesn't regret not monetizing her sex tape. "You could give me hundreds of millions, a billion dollars, I'd never take it."

Throughout the documentary, Anderson is visibly emotional while viewing old tapes of her and Lee. After news of Anderson's split from ex-husband Dan Hayhurst — whom she split from in January 2022 — flashes across the screen, she admits, "I never got over not being able to make it work with the father of my kids." She adds: "Even though I thought I could recreate a family, or fall in love with someone else, it's just not me. So I think that's probably why I keep failing in all my relationships. . . I think I'd rather be alone than not be with the father of my kids."

Anderson says seeing the ads for "Pam & Tommy" gave her "nightmares," adding that she had "no desire to watch it." She notes that no one knew what she and Lee were going through with the sex-tape scandal at the time, and she believes the creators of "Pam & Tommy" should've gotten her permission before making the dark-comedy series.