18 Reasons I Wish I Could Wear a Hazmat Suit (All the Time)

I have hand sanitizer in my purse, my room, my car, my bathroom, and my desk at work. I use it all the time because it's necessary. I also buy it in bulk, because I'm fiscally responsible.

Have you seen what people do on the bus?! You don't even want to know the things I've seen.

Did you know those things rarely get cleaned? You touch it and then you get in your car and touch everything in there, your face, your phone, your bag . . . eeewwwww.

No offense, but I don't know you or where you've been.

Bathrooms are havens for germs. I don't even use public bathrooms if I can get away with it.

You should absolutely not be using your hand to touch the flusher in a public restroom. People have pooped and then touched that. Do you want to touch their poop?!

If I can't, then I hold my breath. Why? Three words: flying fecal matter. I don't want to inhale your sh*t. No way.

Any of these ways is acceptable. Touching the handle and not sanitizing is not.

That stuff is going into my mouth, and everything in a bathroom needs to stay the hell away from my mouth.

There is a map that shows how likely you are to step in poop in San Francisco, and it's really freaking gross. Action has to be taken to keep my home safe.

I do not sit on my bed in them, and I do not wander around the house in them. I get them away from me and my sanctuary.

I don't even touch the bottoms, ever. See poop map mentioned a few slides ago.

Phones are gross. They've done studies. Scrub. Them.

Because it's been out with me and ew.

Please generally stay away from me if you're gross.

Way too many people don't even bother to cover their mouth or nose when they sneeze. I don't need to breathe your germy particles, thank you very much.

People stick their hands all up in bulk bins. So no bulk candy, nuts, rice, etc. for me because I'm not interested in basically licking your hands.

This happens. People do this. With their mouths. *cringe*

Please and thank you.