28 Times Riverdale Got So Weird and Wild, It Felt Like You Were on Jingle Jangle

The fact that she's allowed to leave town instead of facing the law after their relationship is exposed still boggles my mind.

We're all for taking down misogynistic scumbags, but Betty definitely snaps when she seeks revenge on Chuck for lying about his sexual encounter with Veronica. Between almost boiling Chuck alive in a hot tub and slowly pushing his head into the water with her stiletto, it seems like she's actually going to kill him.

Everyone initially thought Cheryl and her brother, Jason, had a thing for each other, but they don't. However, there is some incest going on between Jason and Polly (though, they didn't know they were related). Polly — who's pregnant with Jason's twins in the first season — finds out that her and Jason's great-grandfathers were brothers. But after one of them kills the other, the family splits in two and distances themselves from one another with one side taking the name "Cooper." That would make Polly and Betty the cousins of Jason and Cheryl. Awkward.

Jason's father, Clifford, turns out to be the killer and murders his own son to hide the family's secret drug business, which Jason knew about. Talk about daddy issues.

In an effort to start over, Cheryl sets her house ablaze as her mother, Penelope, looks on in despair. She is Cheryl Bombshell, indeed.

OK, Miss Grundy's continued relationships with underage children is a definite no-no, but the Black Hood choking her to death is still tough to watch.

I'm not even going to lie, I thought this entire storyline was hilarious and just an excuse to show off a bunch of hot shirtless dudes (which, in my opinion, makes it a crazy subplot).

Because it's totally casual to do a striptease in front of your mom just to get into your boyfriend's gang, right?

And then they make Betty help clean the blood. NBD.

Ah, young love!

This really put a damper on the show. Sad.

That's right, Clifford Blossom isn't the only murderous father in Riverdale. Not only does Hal admit to being the Black Hood after Betty puts two and two together, but he also reveals his father, Louis, was the legendary serial killer known as the Riverdale Reaper.

We find out later that Jughead isn't actually dead, but this scene is still brutal. Leave our broody teen alone!

Hiram manages to pin the murder of Cassidy Bullock on Archie, right after the red-headed hunk is named the student body president. So rude.

Seriously, the Cooper family is really messed up.

But of course Hiram survives the assassination attempt and has Hermione arrested at the end of the season. Hermione did, however, succeed at killing Sheriff Minetta, whom she has a secret affair with.

Please — and I cannot stress this enough — don't do something like this in real life. Ever.

Cole Sprouse is never going to live this down.

The nuns created the game to keep patients complacent, giving them the hallucinatory drugs Fizzle Rocks to make them afraid of the Gargoyle King, which turns out to be a statue in their punishment room. But of course, we know that G&G eventually finds its way to Riverdale and inspires a real life Gargoyle King.

Yep, Evelyn is actually married to Edgar and has been posing as a teenager for about a decade to lure vulnerable high school students to the farm. It's pretty disturbing.

First, Edgar (or one of his brainwashed minions) takes Jason's dead body out of his grave and keeps it at the farm, then Cheryl discovers the corpse and decides to take it herself and have a chat with it. There's a family reunion we didn't expect to see.

It's nice to see Hiram behind bars, but the season three finale has confirmed that he has people working for him on the inside. He's already framed Hermione for attempted murder, and we know that his war with Archie and the gang is hardly over. Does this guy realize he's a grown man feuding with teenagers?

After Jason was murdered and the Blossom family's secrets were aired out, Penelope felt as if the whole town turned on her. She also feels as if no one cared that she was sold into the Blossom family as a child bride, which . . . is a valid sentiment. As an act of revenge, she teams up with the Black Hood to wreak havoc, eventually enlisting Chic (whom she turns into Jason 2.0 by dyeing his hair red) to help with their diabolical mission. Meanwhile, she's running a brothel because she's just that good at multitasking.

The Black Hood/Hal didn't kill Chic in season two, believing they share a connection. Instead, they join forces with Penelope (who practically adopts Chic as a second Jason) for a take-down.

OK, so Alice isn't brainwashed after all, but it's disturbing that she'd toss her grandchildren in a fire and willingly almost drown to death.

The farm storyline is hyped up and Edgar is revealed to be harvesting organs (I repeat, harvesting organs) just to have him and his underlings disappear without a trace in the season three finale? Come on. Guess we'll see what happens in the next season.

The lovechild of Jughead's father and Betty's mother is finally revealed! His name is Charles Smith, and he's an attractive FBI agent who Alice is working with to expose the farm's offenses.