24 American Horror Story Characters We Want to See on Hotel

What's not to absolutely adore about Myrtle (Frances Conroy)? Her fiery red hair can be seen from a mile away, she's constantly spitting one-liners, and her last word is "Balenciaga." She's the perfect candidate to return.

Ryan Murphy, if you're listening, please convince Connie Britton to return as the level-headed matriarch of the Harmon family. Season one is a slow build, but Vivien holds her own against her piggish husband all the way to the brutal, bloody end. She's maybe the only good role model American Horror Story has ever had.

Oh, yes. Neil Patrick Harris is one of the best guest stars the show has ever had as Chester, Freak Show's puppet-obsessed magician. What I wouldn't give to see his sequined jacket once again.

Remember Shelley (Chloë Sevigny), aka Shelley the Nymphomaniac, aka Legless Shelley? Girl is a legitimate mutant by the end of Asylum, but I bet she would be fascinating to witness in her earlier days, before Briarcliff.

Queenie (Gabourey Sidibe) is hell on wheels in Coven, and she provides a ton of the comic relief in the season. Sure, she goes through some traumatic stuff (that minotaur scene), but she would make a great addition to Hotel.

OK, Leo Morrison doesn't add much to Asylum, but Adam Levine sure does. There, I said it.

No disrespect to Marie Laveau, but Desiree Dupree (Angela Bassett) is one of the best American Horror Story characters of all time. The woman has three boobs, and she totally rocks them.

I know Emma Roberts is busy terrorizing sorority girls on Scream Queens, but might she spare some time to drop by the Cortez and reprise her role as Madison Montgomery? It could be a surprise . . . b*tch.

Dr. Thredson (Zachary Quinto), later to be revealed as Bloody Face, is an absolute nightmare. He is so insane that he literally makes furniture out of his victims. Outside, he's a suave, educated man, but inside, he's crippled with severe mommy issues. We already know that the Hotel Cortez hosts serial killers, so why not bring on Dr. Thredson for a night or two?

Wes Bentley's Freak Show character, based on a real person, has two faces. I'm all for giving his Hotel character a chance, but two faces are always better than one.

Ah, Moira! What a psychopath. Alexandra Breckenridge really brings her A game to the role of a sexed-up maid (who appears as Frances Conroy to everyone except Ben Harmon). I have a feeling the Hotel Cortez might be in need of some dusting . . .

Eric Stonestreet is so far from Modern Family in this role, and though he appears in only one episode, it's enough to make a hugely lasting impression. He plays Derek, the guy who is deathly afraid of Piggyman. Wouldn't it be nice to see him pop up again — before his untimely demise? Heck, this is American Horror Story, so after would work too.

OK, Madame LaLaurie (Kathy Bates) is a horrible racist and a cold-blooded murderer, but she's undeniably entertaining.

Rarely can parts of American Horror Story be described as endearing, but Ma Petite (Jyoti Amge) is just that. She's a little bundle of joy!

It's time to surrender to Evan Peters's hotness. Tate Langdon from season one is when we all noticed him, but Tate is a psychotic teen who shoots up his school. Kit Walker, on the other hand, is just a really good-looking mental patient who happened to have an encounter with some extraterrestrials.

There's nothing about Dandy (Finn Wittrock) that is normal. From his childlike behavior to his transformation into a killer, he's a mess. Wittrock has a major role on Hotel, but we're still rooting for Dandy to reemerge.

Lily Rabe has played a variety of excellent characters on American Horror Story, but Misty Day is the cream of the crop. She's obsessed with Fleetwood Mac (see above), and she grows people in her backyard.

Jessica Lange decided not to be a featured player on Hotel, but Ryan Murphy hasn't ruled out the possibility of a cameo — especially since he declared that she will be back at some point. Of all of Jessica Lange's alter egos, I would love to see Constance Langdon make her dramatic return, possibly with the (presumably evil) baby she adopted. Tell me you don't long to hear her drawl again!

Dylan McDermott is great on the first season, but let's face it: Ben Harmon is a douchebag. While I have no desire to see him again, I would like to see the wonderfully twisted Johnny Morgan. Sure, he's a psychopath, but at least he's entertaining.

What Christmas isn't made better by a truly psychotic Santa Claus? Leigh Emerson (Ian McShane) is a terrifying, homicidal creep . . . and he would make a terrific addition to Hotel.

If anyone can find out what evil is infesting the Hotel Cortez, it's Lana Winters (Sarah Paulson). The woman is a journalist extraordinaire, even if she does happen to get abducted every once in a while.

Come back to us, dear Violet (Taissa Farmiga). The alt girl embodies the very definition of "emo," without being insufferable. She would add such angsty flair to Hotel!

Ugh, remember Hayden? She may be a homewrecker, but she's one heck of a sassy ghost.

Pepper is the first character to appear in more than one season, so why not keep the ball rolling? It would, admittedly, be odd to see her pop up at the Hotel Cortez, but stranger things have happened on American Horror Story.